Thursday April 16th 2009, 9:29 PM
Filed under: Anger,assholes,doctors,ineptitude,kids,owies,weight


Pricked

I went to the doctor’s tonight and it was good and bad.

He agrees that my depression is just a tad worse, so he upped the dosage on my meds. This has been working just fine for the past few days so I am happy about that. I lost one pound. This is good and bad. It’s good because it is a pound lost. It is bad because it should be more than that. He thinks that my lack of exercise is tied in with the depression. (My doctor is such a genius. He went to med school just so he could tell me that!) Ugh. So I should suddenly be happier about exercise. Well….we’ll see….

Since we are also keeping tabs on my thyroid, I had blood taken. I’ll let you in on a little secret. If you’re having blood drawn after a ‘fast’, schedule that appointment early! In my infinite wisdom, I made my appointment for 5pm. That means nothing to eat…well I ate a small bowl of oatmeal and half a banana…but it’s hard! No lunch! I had turkey in the fridge! I had fruit in the house! Son2 made a fresh pot of coffee!  I was dying, I tell you! I was wasting away….in my mind, anyway….

So the doc takes out a needle and wraps that rubber strap on my arm. I would have been a happy junkie if I used heroin. My veins popped like a teenager’s boner. He jabbed me with the needle and quickly filled the syringe with my blood. (Don’t imagine it, DB! You’ll faint!) Quickly, he rubbed an alcohol-soaked cotton ball on my arm and proceded to cut off tape.

“STOP! Please don’t tape it. My arm is so hairy and that tape hurts when I pull it off. I’ll bruise.”

“Your arm will bruise twice as bad if I don’t put a bandaid on it. Let me just tape it up for you”

Ziiip.

Before I could say, “You asshole” , he had put a strip of tape over the crease of my arm. I couldn’t wait to get into the car so I could remove it. Hubs and I left his office, went to CVS and a couple other places, and finally home. I had forgotten about the tape but it pulled on my skin while I took my sweater off. I lifted my sleeve and tried to ease the strip off. Son2 said, “You always told us not to be pussies. Just give it a good yank, like this.”

With that, he yanked the tape off.

See the circle? That is the needle spot. The rest is the tape!

img_29341

That motherfuckingcocksuckerassholeprickbuttmuncher!




31 Comments »

  1. Mik said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 12:32 AM

    “motherfuckingcocksuckerassholeprickbuttmuncher!”

    Tell us how you really feel :)

    Miks last blog post..Belligerent, racist or plain crazy who knows?

  2. HoosierGirl said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 6:19 AM

    Awwww….poor Metalmom!:((:((

    How could that mean old doctor pick on you like that? This post just backs up my latest post – college degrees do not equal smarts.:-w

    Glad you’re feeling better anyway. Except for your arm. You know what I mean.:d

    J.

    HoosierGirls last blog post..What is "smart"?

  3. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 8:41 AM

    Mik-Those were the only words that I could say. The rest was unintelligible primal screams! :((

  4. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 8:44 AM

    HoosierGirl-College and smarts very rarely go hand in hand. Common sense flees the premises when too many teachers get involved.

  5. Finn said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 8:49 AM

    Ouch.

    I know when you’re depressed it’s hard to get ramped up for exercise, but I find it helps me feel better when I get into a routine.

    Finns last blog post..Perfect

  6. Grant said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 8:51 AM

    I currently have needle marks up and down both arms. I’m afraid that if I get pulled over for something I’m going to be arrested for being a junkie. Also I have to change bandages on my ankles and behind my right knee. The only way they stay put is to wrap the area with cloth tape. I have a stripe of missing hair just above to below my knee, in addition to all the tape prints all over my forearms.

    You amateur. :p

    Grants last blog post..Sick Blog

  7. Robin said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 8:51 AM

    Want me to kiss it better?

  8. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 9:11 AM

    Finn-Since I have already started taking an increased dosage of meds I am feeling a difference. The treadmill is out and dusted off. The sun is out and I think I’ll be exercising with Bandit.

  9. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 9:14 AM

    Grant- When I was getting the shots in my back, I had the tracks down my back and IV bruises on both hands. I can sympathize with your marks. Just don’t get pulled over!!

  10. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 9:15 AM

    Robin-Please? Hurry!!

  11. DutchBitch said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 1:52 PM

    Sigh… thanks… for the warning AFTER describing it…

    DutchBitchs last blog post..House… before House…

  12. Ren said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 3:14 PM

    A couple of weeks ago, my wife yanked a band-aid off of my (11 year old) daughter’s skin. Unfortunately, both the skin and the band-aid were wet at the time. Bad idea. A good portion of the skin came off with the band-aid. I didn’t see it happen, but my I’m sure the reaction was intense.

    I don’t understand the bit about the tape resulting in less of a bruise. Why would that be the case?

    Rens last blog post..100 Photos

  13. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 4:58 PM

    DutchBitch-As long I could help… :d

  14. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 5:04 PM

    Ren-As the doctor explained it to me,the cotton keeps germs away. Then the tape (tight, but jeez, not THAT tight) puts pressure to keep the site from bruising. However, I never seem to bruise so bad that it would matter! x( (And “ow” to your daughter!!)

  15. fantastagirl said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 6:27 PM

    I bruise no matter what they do. I do have them convinced to use a pressure wrap instead of a band-aid or tape – both make me break out… and itch!

    fantastagirls last blog post..Its all good

  16. phinz said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 8:51 PM

    One can only assume you avoid having your brows waxed?

    I NEVER understood that about the tape! They give me a choice at Kaiser when I have to give blood–they can tape it or I can hold the cotton in place with pressure for a few minutes. Pressure please!

    Next time just hold your hand over the thing so he’d have to tape your hand to your arm–screw that whateveritwasyoucalledhim.

    phinzs last blog post..You Can Run, But You Can’t Hide . . .

  17. Koolio said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 9:23 PM

    Oh YEAH…definitely schedule your next lab work for early in the morning so most of your fasting takes place while you’re sleeping! I do that every 6 months when I get tested for my cholesterol and as soon as I’m done, I whip out a cereal bar. And remember, even while you’re fasting, you can drink water and/or black coffee to help you through. Neither one should affect the test results but consult with your dr. about this just in case.

    The lab that I use doesn’t use bandages anymore because of latex allergies and sensitive skin people like me. The past few times I’ve been there, they use that self-stick wrap which doesn’t stick to skin/hair at all. I suppose you could always buy a roll of it and ask them to use that next time you get your blood taken.

    Koolios last blog post..something to be concerned about?

  18. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 9:36 PM

    fantastagirl-I wonder why they insist no matter you do? They always say it’s procedure,but do we HAVE to follow it?

  19. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 9:39 PM

    phinz-The doc placed the tape over my protests. My very own son was the one who ripped it off unceremoniously!! He is the 25 year old “motherfuckingcocksuckerassholeprickbuttmuncher!”
    It is a good idea to get my hand in the way next time!

  20. Metalmom said:

    on April 17, 2009 at 9:42 PM

    Koolio-I never remember to schedule the bloodwork early. I think I’ll have to mark that on the calendar. I definitely need to check into that tape!! Thanks!

  21. whall said:

    on April 18, 2009 at 7:19 PM

    That’s why I had a blood spigot installed.

    whalls last blog post..Saturday whallitics

  22. Trukindog said:

    on April 19, 2009 at 12:04 AM

    Damn! Duct tape would rip your hide off & leave raw meet!

    From the looks of your arm….you must serve one hell of a fur pie!=))

    Trukindogs last blog post..THE WEEKEND JAM #33 SAWYER BROWN/SOME GIRLS DO

  23. Metalmom said:

    on April 19, 2009 at 8:40 AM

    whall-Where do I find this ‘spigot’?

  24. Metalmom said:

    on April 19, 2009 at 8:41 AM

    Trukindog-There are so many ways to respond to this…none of them good! Smarty-pants!

  25. whall said:

    on April 19, 2009 at 12:45 PM

    Metalmom- on my left arm, right on the inside of the elbow.

    whalls last blog post..Saturday whallitics

  26. Metalmom said:

    on April 19, 2009 at 8:50 PM

    whall-I’ll have to peek at that someday. :d

  27. delmer said:

    on April 20, 2009 at 10:52 AM

    I get a bit of blood drawn every 5 months or so. I clot like nothing else and always pass on the band-aid despite the warning I’ll bruise. So far I’ve been mostly bruise free. (And a bruise? If my doc wants to keep me safe he’ll replace all my kitchen knives with plastic ware — it’s a safe bet I’ll cut my finger whenever I slice up potatoes.)

    delmers last blog post..Careers

  28. Metalmom said:

    on April 20, 2009 at 1:00 PM

    delmer-We are like peas in a pod! The few times I had blood drawn by other doctors, I had no bruising either. And the kitchen knives? All.the.time! :))

  29. BlondeBlogger said:

    on April 23, 2009 at 2:58 AM

    Okay, first, I will not have you being depressed. Will. Not. Have It. But since I am helpless here I am going to do the only thing I know how and that is to pray it off of you! And it better work or I will be depressed!

    And secondly, that arm rapist can suck it hard.

    BlondeBloggers last blog post..20 Years!

  30. Metalmom said:

    on April 23, 2009 at 9:40 AM

    BlondeBlogger-After nearly a week of adjusted dosage, I will tell you that I am almost totally out of the funk. Some sunshine will do the rest. AND…that arm rapist can suck it hard.< -- Funniest thing ever!! I will tell the doctor! :))

  31. BlondeBlogger said:

    on April 24, 2009 at 2:49 AM

    Oh yay!!! Amazing how much the sun makes a difference, isn’t it? Glad I could give you a laugh after that torture! Let me know what your doctor says when you tell him he’s an arm rapist, lol!!

    BlondeBloggers last blog post..20 Years!

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