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I believe that last year, I went on a rant about the myriad idiots who block the store entrances, the side walks and the tramcar routes on the boardwalk at the shore. I thought this was kind of isolated to vacation spots because the mouth-breathers are too busy looking at the fancy ‘lectric lights and shiny stuff in the windows. I thought maybe they were so busy turning around to ask “Hey SugarButt! Y’all want some grease on them thar curly fries?” that they didn’t realize that Yo! People are tryin’ to walk ovah heah!
Unfortunately it seems to be spreading. And it doesn’t just apply to the folks strolling along looking at the lights/the sales/ the kids/ the half-clad teenage girls either! Now it is……..
Sports parents.
In my area, there are quite a few fields and the kids play everything …. soccer, field hockey and lacrosse. I don’t include baseball and softball because those fields are set well away from the roads. But the holy trinity of many overprivileged kids is soccer, field hockey and lacrosse. These are the parents who (in my neighborhood at least) are in many cases, well educated and expect their kids to have every single free moment scheduled with some type of activity.
The past few weeks, being out and about with Hubs, we have noticed a newer trend.
The game is over. The equipment is being gathered up and random clusters of parents and kids dot the field. But the others? They are returning to their cars or walking home. And they are crossing streets that are not your friendly neighborhood quiet streets. Oh, no, my friends. They are crossing busy streets. Busy enough to have four-way traffic lights and not just stop signs.
And they are crossing, not at the corners but anywhere they fucking feel like crossing. From between cars they step out with their kids. Some actually wait for the light to turn red and then they cross, stepping between the stopped cars. Not one. Not two. But groups.
One dad, carrying his water bottle and folding chair steps out, to be followed IN A ROW by grammy, wife with stroller, tyke carrying a wubby, and two sportsters playfully punching each other. The light changes and they are still in the street. And the cars begin honking, because they cannot move. But do they ever step it up? Do they perhaps begin to trot? No. They shuffle along, moving as if their feet are clad in lead boots. They never seem to stop….more keep coming….and coming….some at the corners, some still between the cars. None looking.
When the first car in line is the one honking the horn, they will give nasty looks or shout “What is your rush? ” and they begin to walk even slower! What the fuck is up with that?
Even down the shore – not just on the Boardwalk – but also crossing the streets the same way. It’s as if they left their brains behind when they went on vacation. Women walking their kids to the beach, men on their bicycles, and the worst offenders of all…..teenage girls. They shuffle along in their flipflops, texting or talking on their phones, never lifting an eye to the traffic ahead of them. God forbid you honk at them! Their world revolves around themselves so of course they think you are honking at them because they are so hot. They turn toward you with a look of disgust and yell out “What are you looking at, Perv?!” It would never occur to them that they are in the wrong.
Pedestrians have the right of way? Fuck that shit. I do not drive – ever. I am a lifelong pedestrian. When I am crossing the street, I use the corners. And I rush to the other side. Even when a driver waves me across in front of them, I will even hasten my step to a trot. I can’t imagine being arrogant enough to mosey, amble, sashay or stroll.
Think about the last time you were a pedestrian. Did you cross at the corner? Did you walk briskly?
Or were you one of those damned slow walkers that I just want to punch?
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phinz said:
on June 30, 2009 at 5:44 PMI HATE those idiots. Especially the “I donated sperm and watch me strut” daddies of toddlers. The whole world must stop and admire while he shows off his ejaculations, moving at the speed of toddler-legs. And if you have the AUDACITY to honk because you have the right of way, you are immediately judged to be a child-hater and all-around scum of the earth. HATE THOSE PEOPLE!!!!!!!!
I always feel sorry for the kids ’cause they got a rude awakening coming when they realize that no, actually, the world does NOT revolve around them like Daddy said.
phinzs last blog post..Things That Make Ya Go "Hmmmmm . . ."
Metalmom said:
on June 30, 2009 at 6:21 PMphinz-“I donated sperm and watch me strut”
Many of the first “Everyone’s a winner” generation have just graduated high school and college and I am interested in what happens to them now.
lostmahead said:
on June 30, 2009 at 7:42 PMjust popped in to say hi
Lynda said:
on June 30, 2009 at 7:44 PMGod, I want to punch those slow walkers. I hate them in the mall too!
And sometimes I think people are too caught up in their phones to notice that other stuff is going on around them.
Lyndas last blog post..How’s the Weather?
Metalmom said:
on June 30, 2009 at 8:29 PMlostmahead-Why din’tcha call?
Metalmom said:
on June 30, 2009 at 8:33 PMLynda-I think the cell phones are the one of the best and worst inventions ever. Best for all of its uses in communication and emergency help. Worst for all of its capabilities and abuses.
Marty said:
on June 30, 2009 at 10:19 PMThe threat of violence usually accelerates matters here in new yawk.
Martys last blog post..The Nutty Professor- the Musical
Mik said:
on July 1, 2009 at 1:22 AMThe wife is always telling me to slow down, so I ain’t someone you’d be smacking in the back of the nut.
Worst case was when I was going up an escalator and a women at the top dropped a few pennies then stopped and bent down to pick them up.
As I got nearer and nearer I’m thinking “Ya better effing move lady or I’m going to knock you arse over tit rather than have you knock me down the escalator!”
Luckily she moved just in time.
Miks last blog post..Old and wrinkly
bubblewench said:
on July 1, 2009 at 6:39 AMThe worst part is that is how a lot of people get hit. They step out between two cars and BAM! But that is freakin crazy and drives me nuts as well. That is not pedestrian right of way, that’s just stupid. You’re in a crosswalk or corner, then you have the right of way.
And the cell phone thing? Don’t get me started. I rarely ever text and drive or talk and drive. If I can, I’d rather pull over or wait til I get where I’m going. So dangerous, people get all wrapped up in their calls and don’t pay any attention.
It’s scary out there as a driver anymore!
bubblewenchs last blog post..Muchos Gracias
Avitable said:
on July 1, 2009 at 6:51 AMI usually try to clip those fuckers with my car.
Avitables last blog post..I am fat
Robin said:
on July 1, 2009 at 8:18 AMI’m the one that stopped and flashed my tatas at you…remember?
Robins last blog post..For Curiosity Sake
teri said:
on July 1, 2009 at 8:32 AMpedestrian’s ONLY have the right of way in a crosswalk. If there is a crosswalk at the light, only on the green, do they have the right.
I’m so sick of them saying “they have the right”. I’m sure if they were in the driver’s seat they would be honking their fool heads off.
When this happens to me, my car starts moving a little and then they start moving a little quicker.
teris last blog post..We’re going to be late…..
teri said:
on July 1, 2009 at 8:53 AMoh, and I always follow the “driving” rules when walking. Cross at the crosswalks, lights, etc. stay to the right on the escalator if I’m standing still, etc. I do move it a little quicker if I know someone has stopped for me.
I’m considerate that way.
teris last blog post..We’re going to be late…..
Finn said:
on July 1, 2009 at 9:05 AMIt has something to do with money, I think. The rules don’t apply to them. We have a similar problem here except it’s people in cars. They don’t understand that the stop sign means EVERYBODY. Oh, and the concept of lines is completely lost on them. They just stroll right to the front and start running off at the mouth, even if it’s right on top of your in-progress conversation.
And they walk sooooo slowly in the mall. I hate them.
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 9:31 AMMarty-I think NY drivers have a disadvantage….there is safety in numbers and if a herd steps in front of your car,you ain’t going nowhere. I just wonder why I don’t hear of NY’ers shooting more of those slow walkers? ~xc
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 9:37 AMMik-I’d never stop to pick up change on an escalator! If you had knocked her down, the other customers would have applauded.
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 9:40 AMBubblewench-Having been in a car with you,I can vouch for your driving. It isn’t only teenagers who are guilty of chatting while driving (unfortunately) Phone talkers are another bone of contention with me!!
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 9:41 AMAvitable-Stop clipping and just take them the hell out!!! It would make the world a better place!!! (Please?)
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 9:57 AMRobin-Yes, I noticed you. The optometrist said my vision should return in a day or two.
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 10:21 AMteri-When someone wants their own way it always turns into “I have the right” “Free speech” or “You’re supposed to watch out for ME”!
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 10:24 AMteri-I know you can walk a little quicker. After all, trying to keep up with you this weekend, I was beat!!
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 10:28 AMFinn-OMG! I know! Babygirl deals with the “line asses” at work.And don’t ask them “paper or plastic” while they are on the phone!They hold up entire lines like that!!!
Grant said:
on July 1, 2009 at 11:57 AMI have mobility issues and a giant Frankenstein boot on one foot and still I don’t inconvenience the drivers. I hobble as quickly as possible and wait for an opening rather than just walk in front and assume they have good brakes. You owe it to society to run a group of them over as a warning to the others.
Grants last blog post..Busy
Coal Miner's Granddaughter said:
on July 1, 2009 at 2:17 PMSeriously. This entire country is rife with entitlement. “I’m entitled to free everything.” “I’m entitled to be treated like royalty even though I’m not.” “I’m entitled to everything.” “I’m entitled and you’re not.”
I hate it. Abso-fucking-lutely hate it.
Coal Miner’s Granddaughters last blog post..The Brave One
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 3:59 PMGrant-Hub and I have a great deal of patience for the those with physical deformities such as your Frankenfoot. I have held doors open while everyone ran past them in the rain and I have made sure they have plenty of time to cross….if it’s at the corner and on a green light. I think a napalm shooter on the front of the car would be great.
Metalmom said:
on July 1, 2009 at 4:09 PMCMG-I hate that shit too. Around here, the folks look down their nose at you if you mow your own lawn….REALLY!
DaDuck said:
on July 2, 2009 at 5:01 AMSwedes, and I say Swedes because I never saw this in the states, have this thing where they stop, DEAD STOP, in front of doors, top of escalator’s and have a conversation. They just STOP! I un into them and say, in swedish “excuse you”. It takes a minute but they get that I am excusing THEM not ME.
Also, in Sweden, pedestrians have the right away in crosswalks. And crosswalks are placed not only at corners but in various places along busy streets. Swedes just walk right out there, speeding semi or not and EXPECT the cars and trucks to stop because if they are hit it is the vehicle drivers fault. Crazy shit’ eh?
And they walk as slow as snails….stopping in the middle of sidewalks with their quadruple babby carriage with their parental friends and their carriages or with their screaming, ill-behaved kids.
I should have just done a blog post. lol
What was the question again?
DaDucks last blog post..Spammers Ask The Tough Questions
DaDuck said:
on July 2, 2009 at 5:02 AMwow…I need spell check. sorry for all the spelling errors up there.
DaDucks last blog post..Spammers Ask The Tough Questions
Metalmom said:
on July 2, 2009 at 11:49 AMDaDuck-Y’know, if I was talking about the crosswalk, I would try to be more tolerant. I can’t imagine people stopping like that every time you turn around! I would become a bulldozer, just plowing over asses!! (and don’t worry about the errors. I know how typos occur when you get angry and the fingers start flying!! LOL)
Keira said:
on July 2, 2009 at 12:24 PMSweet Jesus… I have missed you.
Keiras last blog post..Like, Totally.
Metalmom said:
on July 2, 2009 at 1:06 PMKeira-Missed you too, Baby!
Eileen said:
on July 2, 2009 at 4:14 PMI always walk briskly and never ASSume that the drivers are watching for my boys and I. Damn asses on their cell phones!!!!!!! I don’t want run over.
I saw an episode on dateline?? where they clocked drivers getting into their cars. If a car was waiting to pull in, it took the drivers on average over an extra minute to pull out. I usually wave and don’t even buckle up to get my car outta the freaking way.
BAD KARMA to these people
Eileens last blog post..Ultimate Summer Sandwich
Metalmom said:
on July 2, 2009 at 5:19 PMEileen-I have noticed that Hubs will slow down when someone is waiting for his parking spot. I’ve always wondered why. and yet he is impatient when HE wants one. You’re right about Karma…..she’s a bitch!