Friday July 23rd 2010, 11:23 AM
Filed under: family,ineptitude,other shit,owies


Malaise

Malaise (pronounced /məˈleɪz/, mal-aze) is a feeling of general discomfort or uneasiness, an “out of sorts” feeling

It’s been four days since I wrote the previous post. At that time I was mid-sickness. Within another 24 hours, I was keeping food down, showering and feeling somewhat better. However, for the past few days I still have malaise. I want to clean house, really I do. I want to do the laundry, to cook dinner….I just sit here and think about it. It takes too much effort for me to actually do it. The thought of the steps involved exhaust me.

Hubs has been home most of the week. This doesn’t help matters. He wants me to sit with him, to watch a movie, to talk. It’s even to tiring to concentrate on that. I have convinced him to watch movies we’ve seen a hundred times. If I have to watch something new, I won’t be able to follow it.

Throw into this stew, preparations for Babygirl’s departure. We have to shop for her dorm, getting linens, dishes, storage supplies etc.  Not only that, but she needs her medical records sent out. She needs to see her doctors for eye exams, prescription renewals, and dental exams. She won’t be able to travel home every other week for checkups. Every one of these is just one more expense – co-pays – that comes out of pocket. Who makes appointments? Me. Who has to keep track of when she is working so that I can plan around those hours? Me. It’s bad during a good week. This week it is a mental nightmare for me.

But much like the nausea that still comes and goes, I will push it down. If I let it out, I’m afraid I’ll end up overwhelmed and when that happens, I’ll shut down.  Hubs is never good at this stuff. That’s why it is my job as wife and mother. It always has been. Babygirl has work, summer day trips with friends who will be left behind and with her brother and his family. Her stress and anxiety will increase as departure day approaches and I don’t want to put more on her plate.

But me? I’m still here with my malaise….




6 Comments »

  1. Mik said:

    on July 23, 2010 at 7:03 PM

    Hope you get to feeling better soon.

  2. Finn said:

    on July 24, 2010 at 10:46 AM

    Your body is just trying to recover. It’ll pass. xoxo
    Finn´s last blog post ..Pause

  3. Metalmom said:

    on July 24, 2010 at 2:28 PM

    Mik-I hope so too. :(

  4. Metalmom said:

    on July 24, 2010 at 2:28 PM

    Finn-It feels like it’s taking forever and I am definitely not patient!

  5. Coal Miner's Granddaughter said:

    on August 3, 2010 at 8:52 PM

    I’ve been feelin’ malaise all summer. I feel you, hon. Your boobs, too! ;)
    Coal Miner’s Granddaughter´s last blog post ..I Haz A Andy!

  6. Metalmom said:

    on August 5, 2010 at 1:19 PM

    CMG-You can always touch my boobies!

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