Monday August 16th 2010, 1:24 PM
Filed under: business,Hubs,ineptitude,other shit

Could You Repeat That Please?

I was sitting on the bed, surrounded by all the invoices saying that my bill was now in collection. (I say “I’m only paying $50 and the hospital says “No, it’s $100 and the insurance company says “Hmm…let’s see….)

Hubs comes home from work while I am in the middle of  ‘negotiations’ and begins to open his mail and messages in the office. I shut the bedroom door so that I can hear myself think and concentrate.

Phone: “Ma’am, can you give me your account number?”

Me: “123-4567-890”

Hubs: (popping his head into the room.) “Who are you on the phone with?”

Phone: “Ma’am, could you repeat the last four digits?”

Hubs: “Who is it?

Me: (gesturing furiously to please wait) “7890”

Hubs: “Is that the plumber?”

Me: “No, it’s not! Can you wait a minute?

Phone: ” That’s not the number? ”

Me: “That’s the number!”

Hubs: “It’s the plumber?”

I swear to God I did not make that up. I’m not that clever.

But I might be clever enough to poison his dinner tonight.

ps: The bill is no longer in collection and I’m only paying $50. Yay me!


  1. Coal Miner's Granddaughter said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 2:12 PM

    GAH! Between hospitals and husbands, us girls should be batshit crazy.
    Coal Miner’s Granddaughter´s last blog post ..Do You Want To Go On A Paranormal Investigation

  2. Finn said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 2:38 PM

    I hate when they do that! Husbands, that is.

    Hospitals can be very thick sometimes. I still have nightmares about the collection calls I used to receive about Lil’ M’s therapy when the state was supposed to be covering it. And we’re talking bills of like $30. Oy.

  3. Grant said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 3:03 PM

    I tried to submit an invoice against that account number and it was rejected. Was that the plumber’s account number?

    I recently got a new bill from the same rotten hospital that keeps creating new bills for work done in June 2009 despite my filing for bankruptcy last winter, and it wasn’t any sissy $100 bill. I get man-sized bills that could sink the economy of a small Latin nation. I am awesome.
    Grant´s last blog post ..It happened again

  4. Metalmom said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 3:12 PM

    CMG-I am. It’s been certified….by a bunch of men…

  5. Metalmom said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 3:14 PM

    Finn-God forbid I tell him dinner is ready when HE is on the phone! He is a Nosy Nate when I am on the phone. This hospital bill shit is a pain in the ass.

  6. Metalmom said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 3:15 PM

    Grant-I can’t believe that you are STILL going through this….Who am I kidding. Yes I do believe it. Hospitals are run by fucktards.

  7. Nobody™ said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 6:14 PM

    Why is that hospitals always fuck up their billing? You should poison the coffee maker in the hospital administration department.
    Nobody™´s last blog post ..HOPE

  8. Metalmom said:

    on August 16, 2010 at 7:51 PM

    Nobody-Oh they fucked it up in their own favor. Same procedure on the same day for hubs and me. He gets billed $50, I get billed $100. It’s taken four months to get this straightened out!

  9. Lynda said:

    on August 17, 2010 at 2:18 AM

    Thanks for reminding me why I like being single. :d

  10. Metalmom said:

    on August 17, 2010 at 7:51 AM

    Lynda-ANYTIME you need reminding, just ask…I have many, many stories of ‘assness’!

  11. delmer said:

    on August 17, 2010 at 8:08 AM

    Speaking of “plumber” and “50.”

    I got a piece of mail from a local hospital. They said that for my upcoming 50th birthday I might want to consider getting a colonoscopy as a present to myself.
    delmer´s last blog post ..New Carpet

  12. Metalmom said:

    on August 17, 2010 at 9:10 AM

    delmer- :)) That’s a good one! (On the flip side *snicker!* You should do it. It’s not as bad as you’d think and the prep is the worst part!)

  13. Sybil Law said:

    on August 17, 2010 at 9:25 AM

    I cannot fucking STAND it when I’m on the phone and my husband walks in and starts talking to me – and we’ve TOTALLY had scenarios like yours! GAH!
    Sybil Law´s last blog post ..My Awesome Jonas Brothers Review

  14. Metalmom said:

    on August 17, 2010 at 10:14 AM

    SybilLaw-HATE it! You’d think they would catch on after two or three times of being screamed at, but NOOO!! X(

  15. teri said:

    on August 17, 2010 at 3:31 PM

    I loathe when people try to talk to you while you’re on the phone. I want to kill them, also. Glad you won the negotiations.
    teri´s last blog post ..Bad body image

  16. Metalmom said:

    on August 18, 2010 at 6:00 PM

    teri-I’m glad too. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, I’m happy!

  17. Shelli said:

    on August 20, 2010 at 10:50 AM

    Gah! That’s so frustrating! I hate it when that happens. But it’s important when I interrupt him on the phone!
    Shelli´s last blog post ..I’m a Big A Chicken

  18. Janelle said:

    on August 20, 2010 at 8:54 PM

    HA! HA! Too funny!! Loved it!
    Janelle´s last blog post ..Stand and Deliver The best ever made- right And I’m 14- not an adult!!

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