Saturday was Shenanigan’s baby shower. Lemme say from the getgo that this was an incredible event thrown by her sister. Because Shenanigans never had a baby shower for Jazzy, this was the opportunity for Jamie to go all out. She did the food, the decorations and had several games planned for the guests…..around 50 of us….in a small house and back yard….in the heat. Despite the weather and crowd, it was awesome and everyone had a very good time.
Shenanigan was surprised….truly surprised. This is no small feat because she is the type of person who needs to every single little detail of things and never likes for plans to go awry. Everyone did a great job of hiding things from her and even son was quiet. She went to lunch with a friend, during which she received a call from Jazzy who told her that she was at grandmom’s with a bloody nose. They jumped into the car and raced there to SURPRISE!
After the food, she started to open her gifts, and Son1 arrived to watch. He stood in the back of the crowd and just looked at her, smiling. A few minutes later he came over to me and put his arm around me. I looked at him to see tears in his eyes. I asked what was up.
“Just look at her, mom. She is so happy. I’m just a little overwhelmed with all of this. Look! We got everything we wanted and then some. All of these people are here because they love us! This is just filling up my heart.”
To hear these words from my son made me emotional too. I always knew he was a sensitive guy, but never realized the depth of his heart. Later he drove me home and it was just the two of us. I asked if fatherhood seemed more real to him now that he had tangible items to prove it.
“Oh yeah. It scares the shit out of me. I mean, you saw how I was at the shower. How will I handle watching Shenanigans in so much pain, knowing that I can’t do anything for her? I hate when she gets upset, so how will I deal with her hurting?”
“You will hold her hand, and rub her back, and listen to her scream. You will tell her that you love her, and that she is beautiful. That is about all that you can do. Afterwards, that is what she will remember.”
My son looked at me and said,”Thanks mom. So…are you going to the Union party later?”
And with that, the subject was changed.
I keep replaying this conversation over and over in my head. I have done a good job with this kid. He is responsible. He is solid. He is a man who is now ready to be a father, not just a dad. He has shown his true colors. Compassionate, sympathetic, gentle, and most of all, loving. Not only does he feel love for others, but he can see the love that he receives from others.
He didn’t only receive gifts for his child, he received the gift of actually seeing the love that flowed from his family, his friends, his extended family.
Most of all, I received the gift of seeing his love for this young woman who will give him the greatest gift of his life…..a son.