Sunday December 14th 2008, 7:22 PM
Filed under: birthday,celebration,family,happy,love

Mother’s Day

Hubs and I were among the first of our friends to get married. Because of this, we also were the first to have our own place. It was the place to be on the weekends. I didn’t mind too much, but eventually, in my pregnant state, I got tired earlier and earlier and wanted everyone out.

Everyone, that is, except for Tom. He was Hubs’ best friend and the best man at our wedding. Out of all of our friends, Tom could come over on Friday and remain to drink and smoke the weekend away.

One Friday, I began spotting. Then I began having contractions. Suddenly Tom acted like a mother hen. I was forced to put my feet up and I was waited on by Hubs and his friend. Now we were on high alert. Saturday night Hubs and Tom cracked open a bottle of whiskey because my contractions were far to irregular to mean anything. They drank the whole thing. Hubs passed out and Tom went to  his own home.

At three in the morning, it was time.

Hubs had a bit of trouble waking up. (Ya think??) I grabbed my overnight bag and paced. The pain was more than I was prepared for. I was ready. Hubs decided to call Tom. Hubs decided that he needed to stop at the local store and get a cup of coffee and some smokes. Hubs decided that he needed to drink the coffee before we could leave. His excuse was that the pre-natal classes had told the fathers that labor could take hours!

Finally we went to the hospital. I was going to do this without drugs. I was going to to be tough. I was in a Catholic hospital. During one great, big hard contraction, I yelled out “Jesus-Fucking-Christ-on-the Cross!!” The nuns who roamed the halls giving random comfort avoided my room like the plague!

Unfortunately, the umbilical cord was wrapped around the baby’s neck. Every contraction cause my baby’s heartbeat to go down. Finally, at 2:30 in the afternoon,  the doctor decided that I would need a Cesarian. I was devastated. I had practiced so hard to do the natural childbirth.  Hubs had to leave the room. The last thing I heard was the doctor’s voice. “Can you give us one big push before you go to sleep?”

And then the darkness.

When I awoke, I was a mother. I had a son. A SON? We had three girl’s names but we couldn’t agree on a single boy’s name. What would I do when they asked for the baby’s name??

Tom had taken care of it. My son is named after his father and his grandfather. His middle name is Thomas-after his godfather.

You were beautiful. Your skin was soft and creamy. Your hair was bright orange and your eyes were so clear. You changed my life.

You are my son. You are my firstborn. You are my everything. And now you are ready to make a family of your own.

Happy Birthday, Son1

Sunday November 23rd 2008, 10:25 AM
Filed under: birthday,Friends,happy

Shots For J

Today is jGrrl’s birthday. (You’d better go and say Happy Birthday!)

Last night, I realized that “Hey! I have limes in the fridge!”. That thought was followed by “Ooh!! I even have thirty year old tequila!” Hmmm…..sounds like a plan…

The ingredients
The ingredients

I was also hanging out on Facebook and began to chat a bit with jGrrl and I sent her something for her birthday and she said that she was having a drink herself. And according to her, it was like we were drinking together. (Wow, that sentence ran on a bit. LOL I guess the shots is kicking in!)

ANYhoodles…Here’s to you jGrrl! Happy birthday, Feliz Cumpleanos, and all that fun stuff!  <:-p

Thursday October 23rd 2008, 9:04 PM
Filed under: birthday,celebration,family,happy,kids,love

A Baby Girl

Once upon a time, there was a happily married young couple. They had two boys, five and ten years old. The boys were rambunctious and well loved by their parents. Yes, it was a happy family…..

but something was missing.

The woman felt outnumbered. Raised toilet seats were commonplace as were the ‘puddles’. The shoes were smelly and the laundry very dirty. She longed for a daughter. She wanted pony tails and dollbabies. She wanted dresses and tea parties. “Let’s have another baby.” she proposed to her husband.”Are you stupid?” He exclaimed. ” Both of the boys will be in school soon and you will have your life back! Besides, work is getting slow and I have to find a new job.”

“Our grandparents raised their families during the Depression. We’ll find a way.”

So the man breathed near the fertile woman and nine months later, they found themselves in the delivery room. The man was excited, for even though he had two boys, he had never seen his wife give birth! He was here! It would happen soon!  He was holding her hand!

He was supposed to be leaving for his first day of his  brand new job!!

The woman said “Go. You need the job. I will be okay. My mother is here with me. Just be sure to rush home to me. Hurry! You need to be at work by 6am!”

She was right. Sadly, he kissed his wife and went to the new job.

Before he had even reached the hospital parking lot, his wife’s labor began in earnest. The doctor gave her an epidural. It seemed as though the labor slowed. She felt no more contractions. So the woman and her mother began making plans to go to lunch.

The doctor returned and lifted the sheet. “Let’s have a looksy and see how you’re progressing…..”

“Hello! Did you know that you had an eavesdropper on your conversation? You have a baby’s head sticking out of your hooha!”

Yes, that was how she arrived. It was a Wednesday morning. 6:31 on October 24, 1991.

At 6:45, the husband returned. It seemed that the boss was furious that the man had left his wife. “Go Home!” He was ordered. “Come back tomorrow!!”

The baby, who was cleaned and swaddled, was handed to her father. He looked at her with tears in his eyes and said “Hey, you.” He had never told his wife, but he had wanted a daughter more than anything in the world. She smiled at him, closed her eyes and they both promptly fell asleep. (A pattern that would repeat itself frequently.)

In the seventeen years since that day, the mother has brushed hair and painted fingernails. She has been there through girlfights, breakups and proms. She will do so until the daughter asks her to stop. (and she will continue long after that too)

The woman may fight with the daughter. She may ground her when necessary. She will tell her to change her clothes or clean her room. They will occasionally hate each other.

But the mother will  always love the girl – with the intensity of a million white hot suns.

Happy Birthday, Babygirl. I love you now and forever.  :*

Monday October 20th 2008, 9:00 PM
Filed under: birthday,celebration,Friends,happy,love

Birthday Girl


Today’s someone’s birthday

Now here’s your invite

To give her some wishes

Just visit her site.


I’ll drink to her health

So much that I’ll hurl

So I’d better say now,

“Happy Birthday, Libragirl!”



Friday October 17th 2008, 9:54 AM
Filed under: birthday,celebration,happy,holiday,kids

I Got My Mojo!!


I’ve gotten back the oomph! for Halloween. Slowly but surely, (as much as my back will allow anyway) the decorations are being pulled out. One by one, they are making their way around my house.


Babygirl’s birthday is exactly a week before Halloween, so when she saw the boxes out, she was so very happy. She said it just didn’t seem like her birthday was right around the corner because the house wasn’t ‘ready’.


Well, I’m ready….and the house will be too….soon!



Sunday March 09th 2008, 10:14 PM
Filed under: birthday,celebration,Friends,happy,love,mr Fab

He’s Fabulous

I don’t have much of a post today but I would like to wish my bud Mr Fabulous a very happy birthday. Don’t plow your head through your cake. Or maybe I should say that if you do, put my slice off to the side first!


I’d like to thank you for making my days so much brighter. Every time I log onto your site, I am guaranteed to laugh or at the very least smile. It has become my own personal challenge to log on and see if I can get to the end of the post without smiling. (I have yet to do that)

No matter how blue I’m feeling, no matter how much I feel like puking from the flu, and no matter how much pain my back gives me, you make it all just that much easier to bear. You make every one of your readers feel like “the in crowd’ and each of your friends feels like they are the “most important” person in your life at any given time.

You call yourself an attention whore. You can be anything you want, honey. We come back time and again because we love you. EVERY BIT OF YOU!

Stop by his place and share the love… Or your skittles… I’m sure he’ll accept both!

Love you, Sweetie!  :*

Sunday March 09th 2008, 12:37 AM
Filed under: birthday,computers,Friends,Hilly,Karl,Kyra,mr Fab,other shit,Turnbaby,VulgarWizard

Sunday Suckage

This weekend really sucks. It is pouring outside. I mean buckets!! And the wind started up too. The empty trash cans in my yard are dancing in circles. I had to throw a brick into each to keep them from blowing away! A few of the branches on the trees around my house are tapping against the cable wires. This means my tv and computer keep popping in and out, making any kind of movie watching or blog reading a pain in the ass.


Secondly, Hubs and the boys are working this weekend. They are tryng to catch up with work that was put on hold during the “Flu Outbreak of ’08”.That means it is Me and the Pup just hanging out. What about Babygirl, you ask? She is far too cool to chill with Mom!She will head out with Handsome to his house or else he will come here and they will sit in a corner and giggle into each other’s ears. (BLECH!) Nothing like being the third wheel to your own daughter!

I guess I will spend the day trying to figure out why the audio on my computer sounds like a Spaniard rolling his R’s.The stutter is making me nuts and this is UNACCEPTABLE-especially on a Sunday! This is my time to spend with my compadres. Mi amigos. YOU GUYS!

With any luck, I’ll have it figured out in time to listen to Vulgar Wizard at 1pm , Karl at 5pm, Hilly at 6pm, Mr Fabulous’s Big Birthday Bonanza at 7pm,  Turnbaby at 8pm, and Kyra at 9:30pm. God, I’m pathetic! I have absolutely no life on Sundays.

*Sigh* Whatever!

Monday February 11th 2008, 10:38 PM
Filed under: birthday,celebration,family,happy,love,other shit,sex

This is the Story of a Girl…

Once upon a time, there was a young girl. She had dreamed of someday leaving the shelter of the pueblo where she had grown up. Upon finishing high school, she was given an opportunity to attend a business school in Amarillo, Texas. She leaped at the chance to see the world.

Thousands of miles away,a rebellious young man was given an ultimatum–move out and get a job,or join the service. He chose the Air Force. Uncle Sam trained him to be a machinist and sent him to Amarillo,Texas.

One night,even though she was feverish with the flu, the girl let her roommate talk her into a blind date. It would be a lark. A one time deal. Go to a dance and then never see the guys again. She agreed.

As the girls entered the dance, the young girl was appalled to learn that the incredibly tall, gangly young man with the thick glasses was to be her date. She was not impressed with his attempts at humor. But boy, could he dance. The difference in their height seemed not to matter. (He was 6’3 and she was 5′). But eventually her fever got the better of her and she asked to go home.The man walked her home and asked for her number. She refused. He went away broken hearted.

The man returned every day to knock on her door to ask for her number. She admired his persistance. She finally gave in. They began dating. One thing led to another and the girl found herself “in the family way”. The man asked her to marry him. She thought he was too young, but he assured her that he was 20 and only looked younger. So she agreed. (Upon signing the marriage certificate, she learned that he was only 17!) As her time drew near, the man put her on an airplaneand sent her to Philadelphia to be taken care of by his family until his release from the Air Force.

A month later, her returned to her and a few weeks later, on a cold February night, a baby girl was born. Little did they know that the little girl would tax their patience, break their hearts and cost them thousands in Catholic School education!

Mom, Thanks for going to the dance. You still look beautiful when you look into his eyes on the dance floor.

Dad, You shouldn’t have lied! Thank you for knocking on her door every day.

And to you both-I’m sorry I gave you gray hair. I’m sorry that I dropped your new set of china the first time you used it. And yes, I was the one who wrote  on the wall and blamed someone else.

Thanks for fucking and making me.

Saturday February 09th 2008, 3:23 PM
Filed under: birthday,family,fantasy,Hubs,kids,love,miscellaneous,other shit,questions


“You load sixteen tons, what do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt. St.Peter don’t you call me ‘cuz I can’t go–I owe my soul to the company store!”

“Sixteen Tons” – Tennessee Ernie Ford

On Tuesday, I will turn 46. God, that sounds old! I certainly don’t feel it. Well, except for the days when my back hurts. Those days I feel every minute of my age.

As I grow older, I find myself wondering  “What if?” alot. Not the “What if I had done A and not B?” It’s more of the “What will Hubs do without me?”

Will he be able to find all the important things, like the banking and insurance policies? Will he know where to look when it’s time to make doctor appointments for himself or Babygirl? Will he take a tylenol when he starts to get sick? Will he remember to eat? Wll he spiral into depression?

And the kids. What will they do? None of them handled the loss of their grandmother very well. I can’t imagine what they will go through if  they lost a parent. I was their strenghth. Who will step in for them? Will the brothers watch out for Babygirl and screen her boyfriends? Will they nag her to do her homework? Who will tell the boys when their behavior begins to slide?

Morbid? Maybe. I prefer to think of it more as practical and realistic. All of you with children must admit that these are thoughts that run through your mind in those late night hours and minutes before sleep finds you.

As I enter another year, I will be a little more diligent when it comes to organizing things. I have already begun to put things away when my kids are around. I’m sure to say,”BTW, Son1, this is where I keep __. Just in case you’re ever looking for it.” I am always greeted with an uncomfortable laugh and a “What would I need to know that for?” Deep in their hearts they know.

I am glad that I do these things. Not that I am planning on going anywhere anytime soon, but that even if I lose my memory or become incapacitated, between them all, they will move on.

I’m not depressed about aging. I think it’s kind of cool that I am 46 and don’t really look my age. I certainly don’t act my age. I’m actually digging where I am as a person. But this is what came to mind as I started this post.

Now if I can get them to remember to get me a cake or  a card…. I really hate making my own cake!

Monday February 04th 2008, 8:54 PM
Filed under: birthday,celebration,contest,Friends,Honors,love,sex,stalking

Be Submissive

Gather around boys(and girls). After the cooking post, I thought I would give you a little treat. A little girl on girl….wink,wink, nudge,nudge! I wanna tell you about my favorite hunny….

 Many of you know my scrumptious friend, DutchBitch. If you don’t, lemme tell ya…You don’t know what you’re missing. She is the girl I wanna be gay for. I  happen to know that #42 on her list of things to know about her is that if you fuck with her, she’ll fuck back (ooh!) and she hails from Dutchlandia .Not only is she a smart, take-charge bitch, but she has the hots to back that up. We can only dream of licking her stiletto-heeled boots!

Anyway, (before I get too hot!) I wanted to tell you about a great contest going on at The Dutch Files.

On February 27, she will be celebrating her  **th birthday. As part of her celebration, she will give us the opportunity to worship her hotness. The best offering of adoration will be granted a prize! Though  she hasn’t announced the prizes yet, I can attest to fact that she gives great prize.

 This is all you have to do:  ANYTHING YOU WANT!(as long as it is “postable”) This means video, audio, picture, sonnet, nude artwork, or artwork done in the nude…ANYTHING! Judging will be done by a panel of judges (willing to be bribed) All entries must be submitted by midnight,  February 20, 2008.


That’s all there is to it. Be a submissive and show her all the loving you can. Or the lust…Yes…lust is gooood!

I hope I pimped this right….I’d hate to be punished for doing a bad job….Mistress might have to spank me for it…..yes….like that…