Wednesday July 13th 2011, 4:19 PM
Filed under: Anger,assholes,computers,ineptitude

Screwed the Pooch

I fucked up. Yeah, again, so shut up.

I have Black Tie protection on my laptop. Or I should say that I had it. It expired in December. However, I got a renewal notice in the mail a couple of months ago and since I always renew, I went online and renewed it. Or I should say that I thought I renewed it. I am having a problem with my USB ports and took the laptop to Best Buy to have it serviced. My charger is also beat so I wanted that replaced also. Imagine my surprise when they told me that I had no coverage! “But you guys have my money!”  The ‘geek’ went online and said that I have no coverage but my daughter did.

Um…what? We never got the service for my daughter because the techs at her college would cover her problems for free, plus if they looked at it once, it would nullify the Black Tie protection anyway. So ‘geek’ told me to call customer service and sort it out.

I called yesterday and I was told that since my coverage was expired since December, I can’t transfer the coverage. Okay. I can deal with that. It pisses me off, but I understand. I just want my money back. When I ordered the protection plan, it was credited to my daughter’s laptop. I was given a  number and told to go online and explain it in an email.

Today, I went online and couldn’t find the place where I was supposed to do this. And so, I called their number once more. Now they want my daughter’s receipt for her laptop. They want info on my daughter’s computer. Why? I don’t understand why this is so difficult. Now, I don’t have to send an email. Now I have to write a letter of intent (to cancel the coverage) I have to explain all of this in writing and include the receipt for kid’s laptop, four part numbers and other shit.

Hoops, people. Fucking hoops. I don’t have the patience for this shit.

The harder I tried to explain to these folks, the harder it seemed to get. The guy kept interrupting me and trying to interpret what I was saying before I finished my explanation. Did he understand me? I couldn’t tell you. But I kept getting more and more confused. We were both speaking English and yet I felt like I was speaking gibberish!

My head hurts really bad now. I want to scream at the top of my lungs.

Thursday June 16th 2011, 11:33 AM
Filed under: computers,Hubs,ineptitude,kids,other shit,questions,weather

New Vintage

I want to say a few things so here we go with a new vintage of whine…

The charger to my laptop has given up the ghost. I am hoping that the cost to replace it is covered under my insurance with Best Buy. Now I know that more than a few of my friends have issues with them, but I have always gotten good results-once I get past the long wait in line or the time it takes to get my stuff back. Lucky for me, the charger that Babygirl uses also works on my laptop, so I will use that, for now, but will also cut back  on my use. What will I do with myself?

The weather has been great and I really want to take down my curtains and wash them or sort through boxes in the basement. I wanted to wait until Babygirl was home from college to help me but to tell you the truth part of me wants to see her relax or earn money for school. Part of me is afraid of hurting my back and the biggest part of me is lazy.

I’m going to the shore with Hubs this weekend. His high school is having a gathering near where we vacation and so we will drop in there. We have taken overnight trips here or there. Most are only that-overnight-but a few have been two. This one is Friday to Monday. FOUR DAYS! I am so excited to be away from our computers, cell phones and cable tv. I used to worry about my kids when I went away, but now I worry that the dogs won’t poop for them. (Bandit avoids it) Now I’ll worry that Mordecai will eat all of Bandit’s food when he’s not looking. Damn ‘kids’……

Started shopping for my future grandSON. He already has some Philadelphia Union gear.(YAY) I am also looking at shower gifts. When did kid stuff get to be so fucking expensive? It’s a racket. The gear for humans that will barely have time to wear/use/fit in is atrociously costly. $500 and up for a crib? $300+ for a car seat that they will use for little more than a year? Holy shit!

And so, that is my wildly exciting life. What have you been up to?

Sunday August 01st 2010, 7:54 PM
Filed under: computers,family,Grief,Hubs,other shit,travel,weight

Something Old, Something New…..

A few things are happening….just a few ….but they are the type of things that keep me from you, my friends.

Something old…..That would be me. Hubs whisked me away for two nights at the beach. We relaxed, met up with my kids for a day on the beach and dinner, and we shared some drinks and smooches. One morning, we rented bicycles and rode them…..and rode them….and-well you get the drift. We rode for forty-five minutes in one direction, turned around and rode back. Lemme tell you, halfway back, I damn near died. My muscles burned, my body spewed off sweat and I could see my thighs twitch with overuse. Yeppers, kids, I am sadly out of shape. Even though I have been exercising, I have been more about the cardio and abs. Apparently, I must learn to do it all.

Something new…..My laptop needs a new fanbelt. It had been overheating a bit and after ruling out overuse and a recalled battery, I discovered that that was what I needed.  And so, my beloved is off for two weeks getting repaired. Which brings me to….

Something borrowed…..In the meantime, I am typing this post on Babygirl’s laptop. This won’t happen very often, I’m sure. I am afraid of doing anything that would compromise this back-to-school purchase.  So….if anything needs to be spilled on here, I will most likely be borrowing the business computer. Ugh! You know how I feel about that!

And lastly, we have something blue…..That would be me. My cousin is not doing very well with her battle against stomach cancer. We only learned of it shortly before Christmas, and she has already nosedived very quickly. I can only hope that she is spared from too much pain. Life is not very fair.

There is also the ‘countdown’ to August 26. That is the day that Babygirl leaves us for her dorm. Yes, I’m blue but also tickled pink–for her. She is excited and so I am, but damn, I will miss her…..

And there you have it.  That’s what’s happening. It’s what keeps me from you all. I hope to catch up with my blog reading because I want to see what YOU’RE doing this summer!!

Thursday March 11th 2010, 2:20 PM
Filed under: computers,ineptitude,other shit


***Once again my laptop is wonky. Now I have an idea of what the problem might be.  I have an HP laptop and therefore if I see an HP update notice, I automatically click on it. As soon as I do, my Adobe programs don’t work consistently. That means no video links, no games, no blueprints sent to the business….UGH! Then I tried to update Adobe and it tells me I cannot load a GUI. I don’t even know what that is!!  So…How do I know what HP update is legit for me? FML.


***I had a few plants that were too big for the pots that they were in. They were actually starting to die because of it. So I went to Home Depot and got some potting soil and started to redo them. The biggest one, I put into a punch bowl to let the roots grow a bit. But a smaller one, I repotted. The next day, I noticed that I had gnats here and there in the house. I assumed that it was because of standing water with the plants.  I put out some balsamic vinegar to get rid of them and finally got around to repotting the big plant. I set up my gear and opened a brand new bag of soil. Fucking gnats came out of the bag! It wasn’t the water, it was the soil! FML.  (Got rid of the gnats, but still….)

***I can’t find my ear buds. I miss watching movies on the laptop and listening to my ipod. FML.

***My dog has stinky gas. My dog only wants to sit right up next to me. I gotta get up and move NOW to escape!! FML.

***I guess that means that’s all for today.

Friday January 22nd 2010, 2:21 PM
Filed under: computers,Grief,happy,ineptitude,other shit

Short Procedures-Pt. 1


My laptop went into  “GeekSquad General Hospital”  for a week.  I needed to get to the root of the problems that she has been having.  So once she froze ( I was unable to shut her off at all!)  I took her in ‘as is’.  The geek looked her over and said,  “Hmm…”  He touched her buttons and proclaimed, “There is only one crash listed here.  There is picture,  audio, quick response,  and to tell you the truth, I don’t see any major problem.”

Of course there isn’t anything wrong!  The system had just been rebooted.  Does that erase any log of previous crashes? I don’t know.  I hadn’t had audio for two weeks and suddenly, Voila!,  he gets it right away.  Even though I had gotten  ‘black screen’  repeatedly,  he got a well behaved laptop.

And so, he kept her for a week to try to replicate the crash,  to tweak the system, and to clean that dirty, dirty bitch.

During the week, I had to use Hub’s computer. Which wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing, except that….

He downloaded a ‘Trojan”.  It was wonderful.  My thoughts were to try a reboot and if it didn’t work,  just suck it up and pay a geek to come to the house and look it over.  But we are talking about a man.  Not just any man, but  my “I-can-do-anything-if-I just-play-around-with-it-long-enough” man.  He pounded buttons.  He deleted programs if he never heard of the name.  He went into the control panels. (He is LESS computer literate than I am!!)

From 10pm until 2am, the sounds of clicks, sighs, and restarting computers emanated from the den. I was startled from my sleep by shouts of “What the fuck?”  “Are you kidding me?”  “No, No, No!!” and my personal favorite “You will obey me!”

Eventually, he came to bed and I was finally able to sleep.

When I woke up, I poured myself some coffee and Hubs came into the kitchen to get his cup too. “You can check your emails before I use the computer. Just make sure you wait until each page loads completely before touching a button.”

He had done it. It worked….sluggishly, but it worked! We went to the store and bought a new security program which he installed -all by himself!  And it is still working!! However, as far as my blogging was concerned, it was far too slow for me to use without getting extremely frustrated.

And so, I pined for the return of my baby.

I got her back last night and so far, she is acting like a new laptop.  She is speedy.  She is getting along with all of her programs.  I can hear movies and CDs and videos.  She shuts off and turns on right away.

I didn’t get charged.  But I have been instructed to bring her back – again, ‘as is’ –  if anything should happen again.  No rebooting,  no battery removal, no slamming her against the floor.

I guess now I can tell you about all the other  ‘procedures’  happening around here……

Just one thing at a time.  I don’t want to overwhelm her.

Saturday January 02nd 2010, 4:48 PM
Filed under: Anger,computers,Grief,ineptitude,other shit

Here Today and Gone Tomorrow

Just before Christmas, my computer started acting wonky. Oh, it’s not the first time and I’m sure it won’t be the last time. This time, however, it just wouldn’t or couldn’t be persuaded to stop misbehaving. I called my friend to take a look at it, and unfortunately, he was busy with all the extra work hours that come with the holidays. I tried a few other places and finally decided to wipe all the shit clean.

I have only just discovered the joys of a ‘flash drive’. I used this new-found edumacation to remove all the photos, business records and my personal ‘manuscript’. I was so very pleased with myself. Next, I did the one thing that can make me break out in a cold sweat…..

I rebooted.

To everyone else, this may seem like an easy task. But to me, it is like deleting all the information in a phone book. I was afraid of what I would possibly lose. I was afraid that I would hit the one button that would blow my laptop into oblivion. How could I explain that to Hubs, who was wonderful enough to get it for me only one short year ago? How could I explain that I broke my expensive toy? But reboot I did.

And guess what? FUBAR! Seriously. I could turn it on and it would immediately go to a black screen. I waited to see if it was just being slow to say “Welcome”. I waited for it to say “Your last session ended abruptly”. I waited for it to say…ANYTHING! But no. Nothing. I decided that I would wait until the holidays were over and see if my friend could find some time for me. If not, I’d try the Geeksquad. After all, they were the ones who brought my baby to life in the first place.

Of course during this time I left using the slow business computer. I could stop in on Facebook here and there. I could check my emails and not much else. During this time, I missed chatting with my friends. I missed sharing holiday greetings, substituting a generic “YaY Holiday” in place of individual “Say hi to Hubby”, “have fun in Cabo,” or “I miss you all”.

Naturally, going by Murphy’s Law, I suddenly had so much to blog about! I had issues! I had complaints! I had love to share! There holiday stories, pictures, and even a video!! But alas, Hub’s computer was so slow that it was far too frustrating to even try to get them posted.

Yesterday, I dug out my receipt and my service contract. I was going to check and see if I had passed the ‘one year’ date for tune-up and even if I had, I would take it in to ask WTF?

And so, for shits and giggles, I decided I would start up the old girl. I would make note of everything that happened or didn’t happen. I might even reboot it again for good measure and then take it to the geeks. And guess what…?


I got onto the internet. I checked email and I went onto Facebook. While on FB, I was told that it was my turn at ‘scrabble’. I clicked in and I needed to update my Java – which I did.  And then….nothing. Fade to black.

AHA!  Now there was an issue again. So Hubs and I packed her up and took her to BestBuys. And I’m sure you know what happened…..Yep, she started right up. The guy looked her over and there weren’t even any ‘trouble’ records. It was just like it was when I got her. Other than needing a security update, there was nothing for him to do. I’ll do that and also have her cleaned in the next week or two. I am to use her as usual, and also add on Firefox, or Java, or any other program that was there before. And then, if she sleeps again, just bring her in without trying to fix her myself.

So, I am on borrowed time. Will she start tomorrow? The day after? I don’t know. And of course, as I sat down to write a post, I went blank. I had nothing to say. I have no issues, no complaints…..

just an explanation to you all for where I’ve been, and why I seem like a fucking slacker about posting. I’m sure I’ll be so damn prolific if I suddenly find myself without a laptop again soon……*sigh*

So……What have you been up to?

Tuesday August 25th 2009, 11:27 AM
Filed under: computers,happy,kids,other shit

Just Stopping By

Lately I have been having computer issues. Sometimes I have a connection and others….well others just suck. That’s why I haven’t been around. Today I am using Hub’s business computer and I really hate it. :(

Nothing much is going on. I have been enjoying the end of the summer, catching up on reading, and doing some needlepoint. Tomorrow is what I consider to be my “back to school”


Yes, the kids will return from their vacation and I will have them for the two weeks before their school year begins. After that, it will just be the little ones again. On the one hand, I am looking forward to it because I really do like hanging out with them.  On the other hand, I will be returning to diapers, snot and whining. Anyway, the good outweighs the bad.

So that’s it. I just wanted to stop in and say “Hi” and let you all know that I haven’t abandoned the blog or you. I’ve just been in my “happy place’ .  :d

Thursday February 26th 2009, 9:57 PM
Filed under: computers,desire,Friends,Grief,Karl,lessons,love

The World Moves On

I have reconnected with the outside world!!

Let me tell you, it was weird. I didn’t always have a computer. I didn’t always blog or read blogs. And during the past day and a half (that felt like a lifetime, I swear!) I returned to those simpler days…before the world moved on…..

I did laundry, cleaned the house, showered and played with the dog.

Wait……I do that anyway…..hmm…..

Yeah, it was like that! I wandered from room to room, from window to window, muttering “What to do? What to do?” You know something? I did that once before…..

WHEN I QUIT SMOKING!!  OMG! I remember the feeling of idle fingers that desperately wanted to hold a cigarette. Only now that desire was the tapping of computer keys. It was then I realized I had a problem. I ran to Babygirl’s room and quickly logged into Facebook. I took my turn at a word game. I said hi to a friend or two. But Babygirl has an uncomfortable stool that she uses in her room and I couldn’t sit there very long. I sighed and resigned myself to the fact that I’d be out of the loop…..only for a smidge over twenty-four hours, but still….

I was only able to sneak a peak at the computer once or twice, but I still missed a few things. Ginger‘s daughter was ill and I missed a few updates. (I’m glad that she’s feeling better) Apparently there was also a meme that everyone was doing on Facebook that sparked some debate. That was interesting to catch up on. And lastly, but certainly not least, A blog friend is nearing the end of a valiant fight. This hurt the most. I wanted to share the sadness that I felt but I had nowhere to say it.  Another friend was faced with a daunting challenge that no one would want to do. (I wanted to hug him and offer my thoughts and prayers, and again, nowhere to do this.)

And the world moved on…..

But my days weren’t only filled with sadness and boredom. Oh no. My own little Babygirl received a grant so that she can attend an eight week art course at Temple University’s Tyler School of Art. (Proud mom over here!!) Tonight she went out to get her supplies and her sketchpad is bigger than she is!!

And the world moves on…..

Yes, the world moved on. I wasn’t connected to the computer. And I survived. Which is more than Lisa can do. Because of knowing her (even though only through the computer) I have learned that life is a fleeting thing. I owe it to her memory to turn off the computer willingly to talk to my Hubs, to look at Babygirl’s art and photographs, and to actually go out into the sunshine instead of looking through a window wondering what to do.

I wish you peace, Lisa,  as you embark on the next journey that awaits you. Thank you for touching my life.

Sunday November 16th 2008, 6:26 PM
Filed under: assholes,computers,miscellaneous

A Gift of A Post!


I have written before about the kind of emails I tend to get. However, I checked my spam the other day and I was amazed that someone left me the gift of a post in the “subject lines”!

You have yellow teeth. But here! Get free cases of cola! (As if I would need it if my teeth were yellow!)

Need a cheap car?  Need a job? Maybe to pay for that car!

Nurses wanted! But maybe you need Financial Aid to go to school for training.

Sexxxy singles! Congratulations!  I guess I made out okay at eHarmony dating. 

He Guangbe pretty happy. Maybe he has joined the Hetero Handjob Club. Congratulations!!

I swear that these were all email subjects (I’m sure you’ve gotten them too.) I also swear that this is the EXACT order they were received!

I couldn’t pass that up!

Monday October 27th 2008, 8:53 PM
Filed under: computers,ineptitude,kids,lessons,other shit


I have said this a few times in the past couple of days and I think maybe I should just get it all out there.

I am afraid of numbers.

Not phone numbers, bank accounts or sizes, but geometry, calculus, advanced algebra.

Why? I really don’t know. When I was in school I did well in math with the basics. Addition, subtraction, division and multiplication were fun for me. I enjoyed learning how to put these things together. I can balance a checkbook down to the penny. I can go shopping-knowing I have only $300 in my pocket- and have the cashier tell me that my total is $298.99. (Seriously–I have witnesses!) All without the aid of a calculator.


But something changed. I don’t really remember where. Maybe it was long division. Maybe it was square roots or that 0010010101110101 crap. I still don’t get it. I still don’t need it. (Even though countless math teachers assured me that “someday, you’ll need it!”) All I know is that once in high school, I would freeze. My mind would go blank. My mouth would suddenly go dry. My palms and pits would get flopsweat. It wasn’t just test anxiety. It happened in class. It happened while being tutored. It happened while dad tried over and over to tell me how the numbers meshed.

As my kids grew up, they would ask me for help. My eyeballs would burn and my heart would begin to pound. So I’d pass them on to my dad who could solve damn near any number problem thrown at him. Why didn’t I inherit that gene?

Then, they learned a new math. IMP. This is when the teachers in all of their infinite wisdom want a ten year old to explain why 4 + 5 = 9. ?  WHY? BECAUSE THE ANCIENT EGYPTIANS DECIDED SO!! Isn’t that good enough? My kids could do the problem. They could show the work. They could get the answer right. But they couldn’t explain why it was right. And they were penalized for it. (Because each was considered a separate part of solving the problem. Don’t know one part? Lose points)

I think it was a conspiracy cooked up by mathematicians who feared that with the advent of calculators and computers, their jobs as math teachers was becoming obsolete.

Who needs to learn math? I have a calculator on my phone!