Trukindog wants to know more about me.  Why? Don’t I give enough of myself? All I ever do for people is give, give, give! It used to be just family and very close friends, but now even my bloggin’ buddies are infringing on my generosity. Well, Tdog, you are so lucky that I am still medicated and can’t think of anything better to post!

So here you have a half dozen factoids (not to be confused with hemorrhoids.)

1.  From April through October, I have incredibly healthy fingernails. They grow long and are so strong that even when I press on them, they do not bend. However, after October-without fail-they will break, split and peel. I have used gelatin, extra coats of nail polish and lots of other things to keep them long but it never works.

2.  I have never met a vampire, werewolf, troll, ogre or banshee. I have actually met a witch.

 3.  I love ‘different’ ice cream flavors. While chocolate and vanilla are always nice,I much prefer Moose Tracks, Chunky Monkey, Cherry Garcia, Rocky Road, and brownie chunk ice creams.

4.  When I met my husband, he had his arms around another girl. The first thing I noticed was his ass.

5.  The second thing I noticed was his forearms. I love a man with muscular forearms like Popeye. Not arms bulging with muscles like a body builder—just ‘working man’ rugged.

6.  All of my siblings and cousins are named after someone else in the family. I am not. My dad liked my first name and my mom liked my middle name. No one else has either name. However, I married into a family in which I am one of three others with the same first name.

Now for the bizniz part of this deal:

1. Link to the person who tagged you. THANK YOU, TRUKINDOG!!

2. Mention the rules on your blog.  Okay, here they are.

3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours. Did you read them?

4. Tag 6 bloggers and link them. Tug, Cissa, Winter, Nobody, Fantastagirl, and Shiny. Come on guys—admit it…you need blog fodder!

5. Notify taggees by leaving a comment on their blog. I’m going, I’m going!

Taking Babygirl to the bus at 3:00am was not the most fun thing in the world. I found out that there were no seatbelts in the bus (strike one).  Band director and leader of this trip was nowhere to be seen –even after acting like an asshole regarding questions about the trip ,which he didn’t address until twelve hours before departure!(strike two). And among the crowd of waiting teenagers and bleary-eyed parents, no one seemed to know what the fuck was going on! (strike three)

Since I had taken Tug’s advice (breathe and drink) I was more than a little bit angry and I will admit, I started to make my feelings known. (Don’t worry-Hubs told me to ’shut up-voices carry’ LOL) Finally I couldn’t take it anymore and since Babygirl seemed to be calm and patient, we said our good-byes and went home.

12:00 noon-(ish)- I got a text message. They had reached New York. I asked if she had seen anything cool yet and her reply scared me. “OMG! I saw a gang of teenagers attack an Old Country Buffet!!”

Excuse me, WHAT??? Oh my God! What kind of area are they driving through??

Then it dawned on me….they had stopped for breakfast. (Tense much Mom?)

2pm - They have reached Niagara Falls. I tell her to ‘take pictures and don’t fall in.’ She said “Don’t worry, I’ll jump.” Damn little smart ass is not making me feel better!!

7pm -They are at the Royal Victoria Theater to see a stage production of Dirty Dancing (Nobody puts Babygirl in the corner!) I already miss her. I had to put the leftovers away myself.

11:30pm-I sat up and waited. Really, I tried not to fall asleep. Imagine my surprise when my cell phone (which was beside my head on the night table) rang and startled me from a deep slumber! “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you. I just wanted to say good night and I love you. I’ll call back in the morning. Love you!”

I hope tomorrow is easier!

 This meme is entitled Toast & Tea & Me and I stole it from Kapgar.

1. What is your occupation? I am a child care provider by day, and a super hero by night. I cannot divulge my secret identity.(But it rhymes with “kettle bomb”)

2. What color are your socks right now? I am rocking the Catholic school navy blue knee high socks. (But not the uniform-yet)

3. What are you listening to right now? Babygirl’s excuse for buying shoes that look like slippers.

4. What was the last thing that you ate? Avocado slices on white bread.

5. Can you drive a stick shift? A what? I don’t drive ANYTHING-except when I drive my husband crazy.

6. Last person you spoke to on the phone? I told David I was going to get my hair done and he squealed.

7. Do you like the person who sent this meme to you? No one sent it to me but I do like the person I took it from. (Thanks Kev)

8. How old are you today? 45 years, nine months and 6 days old.

9. Favorite drink?Southern Comfort and Coke after 4pm. Earl Grey tea before that and cawfee light and sweet before 12.

10. What is your favorite sport to watch? Baseball and World Cup Soccer

11. Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes, when I was running from the police that one time, I went blonde.

12. Pets? My iguana, Baby, and the freak I keep leashed in my basement for my private amusement.

13. Favorite food? Steak– singed and slightly mooing.

14. What was the last movie you watched? Today I watched EdTV, the Truth About Cats and Dogs, The Final Cut and Valiant.(I was stuck on the couch!)

15. What’s your favorite day of the week? Sunday. We go out for breakfast, laze around reading the paper, watch a movie. Then I listen to my friends on blogtalkradio.

16. How do you vent anger? I turn on music,very loud, and clean the house.

17. What was your favorite toy as a child? My jigsaw puzzles and my brother’s Lincoln Logs, Legos and Tinker Toys.

18. What is your favorite season? Baseball Season. Oh and a tie between fall and summer.

19. Hugs or kisses? Yes, please.

20. Cherries or Blueberries? Blueberries!!

21. Do you want your friends to try this meme? Only if they would like to compare themselves with my greatness.

22. Who is most likely to respond? Hmmm…maybe Tug…maybe not.

23. Who is least likely to respond? Duh! Kapgar! Because I took it from him first!

24. Living arrangements? I haven’t made them yet, although I have considered my funeral arrangements.

25. When was the last time you cried? Thursday, when I realized that my iguana was seriously sick and could have died within hours of my finding her that way.

26. What is on the floor of your closet? Shoes, an umbrella, a skateboard and a large canister of legos (a combination of answer #1 and #17)

27. Who is the friend you have known the longest that you are sending this to? I will send this to no one because many people don’t like to do memes and others like them and they may have done this already. Who have I known the longest? In “real life”, Lostmahead. I’ve known her 30 years. In blog life, Mr Fabulous. I started reading him a little over a year ago.

28. What did you do last night? I visited my father-in-law in the hospital and then came home and hand fed my iguana water, and slept with her in my arms on my couch all night.

29. Favorite smell? The dusting powder the barber uses on Hub’s neck after he gets a haircut, and the smell of an infant’s head.

30. What inspires you? My friends and family.

31. What are you afraid of? Spiders. And of falling down the stairs when I’m alone in the house after I see a spider. And of spiders crawling on me as I lay on the floor paralyzed from the fall I took after I saw that no good spider.

32. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? A big, juicy bacon cheeseburger with pickles.
33. Favorite dog breed? Bull Mastiff. I’d love to own one if I had a farm for it to run on.

34. How many states have you lived in? Just one when I am home. But….. I have lived for more than a day in New Mexico, Georgia, Florida, and Maryland. (I consider vacationing to be “living somewhere else for more than one day.”

35. Favorite holiday? I had considered Halloween to be my favorite holiday since I was a kid. However, I was too bitterly disappointed this year. I think it will now be Christmas.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you to everyone who sent on their thoughts and prayers when I was a mess last week. Baby had gone through severe dehydration because our heat is now running full time. All exterminating spots have been thoroughly cleaned and we are currently trying to figure out how to keep the air ‘moist’ without ruining our office equipment or paperwork. Space is VERY limited so moving her will be tough!

She is eating baby food and cream of wheat.She is drinking a type of lizard ‘Pedialyte’. She is getting feistier by the minute and she is walking and starting to climb in her cage. The one thing I thought would NEVER happen is coming true.

She WILL be her old self! 

Please excuse the shades. I can’t see very well because the paparazzi were lined up to get my picture. Jeebus!  Flash your naked cootchie and they NEVER leave you alone!!

You know I’ve never given an interview. Not because I haven’t been asked. Mr Fabulous sent me some questions and I’m still having them translated. (I promise to get to them soon,dear!)

However Tug…how should I put this?…..She kisses better ass than anyone. So here you go, Tug! This is for you!

1.   You are a diva!  What is on your ‘must have’  list for your dressing rooms wherever you travel? 4 ‘C’ batteries (don’t ask) , a bottle of Southern Comfort, 2liter Coke and a bucket of ice. Maybe a glass to put it in.  A ‘No Smoking’ sign, a gay masseuse (because he won’t hit on me) and a newly released convict ( because HE will!)

2.   Is Jerry Garcia grateful to be dead?   I don’t know- but I am! (KIDDING!–Don’t wanna piss off the Dead Heads!)  I’ve never been a fan. That music’s too mellow for me.

3.    You can be anyone (dead, alive, past or present) for one day. Who would it be, and why?   Seriously,  I’d like to be Webmiztris. She had a dream and she’s making it real. And she looks good while doing it.  Her or whoever Johnny Depp is fucking.

4.   What do you wish you’d invented?   The vibrator. Oh,yeah. I said it. I’d be responsible for making women (and I’m sure a few men) smile, relax and sleep well.  EVERYONE WOULD LOVE ME!

5.   Do these pants make my butt look fat?   Yes. I’m your friend and a real friend tells the truth. Your butt looks big and the color is all wrong. Put them back and try again!  Not really. I’m just jealous that they look better on you than on me. I can be bitchy like that.

Well, there you have it. Tug, that was truly fun. You can interview me any time. (just remember that I won’t talk about my affair with that famous blogger–you know–because of the restraining order.)

Today is full of Wednesday Wishing. Like, I wish Hubs had stayed home. It’s dark and gloomy with thunderstorm warnings posted for the day. It’s a good day to cuddle up in bed with a few good movies!……I wish there were less assholes in the world who find joy in spoiling the endings of movies or books by leaking the information all over the internet. To them, I say a great big FUCK YOU!!…….I wish I had Ryan Reynolds and Jessica Biel with me right now lol…….I wish I could call some of you on the phone, just to say ‘hi’ or ‘come over for beers’ or ‘let’s go shopping’. Others woould get prank calls, and certain ones would get booty calls! (maybe you) …..I found this thing, you know, with buttons?Well the light comes on but then it gets hot. I wish I knew what it is or how it worked…….And I’ll bet Babygirl wishes she had listened to her Mom and bought that umbrella we saw at the store on Sunday! It sucks to walk to work in the rain!!….I wish I had an idea for nasty postcards before Avitable! He’s gonna make a mint on those fuckers!

The last wishes are serious. I wish I could hug my girl Chlorine Jenny who’s son got a bit sick. ((Jenny)) He’ll be fine!…..Hug to Tug ((Tug)) who is also worrying about family….And  to Mr. Fabulous ((Fab)) who has come down with shingles. If any of you have ever been around a sick or uncomfortable man then you know what Mrs. Fabulous is going through!!!  (((Mrs. Fabulous)))

 So what are you guys wishing for? Anyone got a genie we can share?

When I heard the news about NYCWD’s loss, I wanted to write a post that would express my condolences and convey the feelings that were breaking my heart. I was unable. Some of my other friends were much more eloquent. I had learned a long time ago that “when in doubt- don’t. So I didn’t.

Yesterday, my family celebrated the HS graduation of my niece Sally. I’m sure that many of you have also done the same at this time of year. Good food, good friends, and especially family. This was the first ‘total’ family gathering since Christmas. It was wonderful to see how the babies have grown.The younger kids are all involved with sports and are doing exceptionally well. The older ones brought their girlfriends, boyfriends, new cars and new phones.Yes- you know the scenario,because you all have families too.

My mother-in -law died 2 1/2  years ago. Because of her sense of family, my children grew up with their cousins as their best friends. They go to clubs, concerts and sporting events together as well as just hanging out playing video games.It’s not unusual for me to wake up to see a nephew on my couch sleeping. My father-in-law is very ill. He may not be with us for another Christmas. This fact was not lost on any of us-even the youngest.Yet we partied on- Dad included. We cried remembering Mom and laughed  at the memories of her time with us. And we’ll do it again when Dad is gone, as painful as it is to imagine how soon that may be.

This is what we do. And we do this because life will go on. Dawg, someday you’ll smile. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But eventually….Because this is what we do.

On a lighter note-listen to Mr. Fabulous’ radio show tonight at 7pm EST on blog talk radio. His guest will be our friend Tug from Just Tug. The link to the show is at Pointless-  Drivel. It promises  to be a lot of nasty fun and great laughs and we could use some now.