It’s that time of the year again folks….VA-CAY!!!! After all the crap that has been thrown at us this summer (and it’s only half over!) we are ready to roll. We don’t leave until Sunday, but I gotta pack now.

Here’s a question for all of you…..

What do you have to pack? What can’t you be without?

Here are my top five must-haves:

My iPod. I intend to sit on the beach alot. One year, I took my new CD player and three new CDs with me and ruined them all. Sand scratched the discs and got into the crevices of the player. I am so stoked about having all of my music with me without the worry of having them destroyed.

My coffeepot. We love our coffee. Even though we will be going to breakfast every day, we still like to have a cup of joe while we are dressing and waiting for Babygirl and her girlfriend to make themselves pretty (God, mom! We might see boys!)

My Chair. Before I hurt my back, I would head to the beach with a bag containing sun screen, water, gum, a watch and music. I’d spend the day basking under the sun on a blanket spread on the sand. Not any more! I can’t get up once I get down! So now my chairy goes with me.

Aloe Vera Gel. Because the fairest one of all *coughHubscough* will forget to use sun screen-every year, without fail!-and get burned and will spend the rest of the time crying that “It Hurts!”

And last but certainly not least:

After last year’s fiasco, I’m going prepared. I want to relax, so if you have sucky disco music, I DON’T WANNA HEAR IT!

Yesterday at 3:55 pm -surrounded by his children and eleven

of his sixteen grandchildren-

Dad sighed and went to sleep.

Yesterday was for tears.

Today we’ll celebrate his life.

“““““““““““““

Thank you all for your support. I was told that I was the strong one. I have all of you to thank for that. I couldn’t have done it without you.

What I’ve learned this week:

When surrounded by family, in one’s own home, even the most horrible illness can become almost bearable.

Children fail to see the illness when it’s their Grandpop. They tell him his hair looks funny or that his diaper is showing. It makes him laugh and breaks the tension among the adults.

I would prefer to relay the news of someone’s death after the fact. Telling lifelong friends, family and relations that death is pending only gets harder with every retelling.

The one you would least expect to become ‘Martha Stewart’, may suddenly step up to the plate to offer copious amounts of alcohol and food to the many folks that suddenly show up after work and throughout the night.

Friends–near and far–can save my sanity. I have returned to read all of your comments several times throughout my days this week. Every single one has been cherished. Every single one has been like a hand holding my own.

And every single one will comfort  me when the inevitable occurs.

A funny thing happens during a vacation, holiday, or long weekend. You know what it is because you  have all felt it at one time or another.

It is the “Time Warp”.

I was able to hang out on the Fourth doing nothing in particular. I played on Facebook and played with Bandit. I visited my FIL in the hospital. Later on in the afternoon, my son gathered up his single friends who had no plans and held an impromptu barbecue. All in all, it was a great day.

After sleeping in a bit on Saturday, I got up, showered, and went out to breakfast with my girlfriend and my daughter. It was a good time. I napped in the afternoon and when I woke up, it had happened. Time shifted.

I couldn’t shake the feeling that there were things that I had to get done because “tomorrow is a work day.” I felt like I had to finish other things because the radio shows that I listen to were coming on soon. I thought my son had to go to work because it was Sunday night.

It was no such thing. It was only Saturday.

This particular ‘time warp’ is different from wishing that time would move faster.”It’s only Wednesday??” Doesn’t apply. It’s the warp where you realize that you  have an extra day. You can sit down and relax or finish the job that you have been putting off.

It is kind of related to the feeling when you eat dinner early or finish a task way ahead of time. “Why, it’s still early! I still have time to ___!”

When the holiday happens to fall on a Monday, it makes the week whiz by. Thursday comes along and all of a sudden you realize that the weekend will  begin tomorrow!

It’s a time warp and it’s a bonus.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdu7xoHU9DA

I found a couple of pictures that I thought were funny. Can you come up with a funny caption? Cute, stupid, offensive or just funny. Give me your best shot! 

A.

B.

C.

D.

I know you guys have it in you! Let’s see it!

Sunday is my one year Blogaversary,but since it is also Father’s Day, I’m posting this today.

One year……It seems to have gone by so fast, which is strange because when I was waiting for the holidays or for vacation, it seemed to c.r.a.w.l. by. I have learned alot of things about my blogging friends but more than that, I have learned about myself.

I have learned that even though everyone complains about memes and never wants to be tagged, they sure do jump at the opportunity to do one  and thus save themselves from a “dry day”.

I have learned that I have been to the doctors alot this past year, mostly for myself. Thankfully, I got the job done and I’ll be cool for another year or two.*knock wood!*

I have learned that although I have considered myself to be a fairly easy-going person, alot of things piss me the hell off. The difference is that before I blogged, many of these things went unexpressed. This led to mood swings that were borderline psychotic. Now that I can spew forth through my keyboard, I find myself relaxing more than I can ever remember doing.

I have learned that when your world comes crashing down around you, your friends are there to help pick you up. I have seen the depths of despair and the heights of joy through the eyes of my friends. I have seen the generosity of strangers. And I have seen you open your hearts to me and to each other.

I have learned that I am crazy in love with my family. Only the ones you love can make you become a raving lunatic. Only the ones you love can hurt you so very deeply. Only the ones you love can make your heart swell with pride. Only the ones you love ever see you in your jammies, with last night’s mascara running across your eyes, with that white gunk on the side of your lips, while dragon fumes escape your mouth and all the while STILL give you a hug and kiss in the morning!

Blogging has become so personal and simultaneously public to me. I have made some of the best friends. You make me laugh. You make me cry. You let me know that I am not the  only one out there who feels like a dork.

And you let me know that some days,  though I may be the only one in the house, when an outburst of laughter is heard, it’s just me….being silly with my friends.

I’ve been tagged.. AGAIN! Thank you VulgarWizard, you’re the best wizard I know and I love being tagged by you.

1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning of the post.

2. Each player answers the questions about themselves in their post.

3. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5-6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

4. Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answer.

1. What was I doing ten years ago? Son1 was graduating from High School and getting ready to go away to the army. I was a mess thinking about how my baby was leaving me. He was only 17. Hubs told me to get over it and it wasn’t sitting well with me. Needless to say, I was hating him for that.

2. What are five things on my list to do today? (1)Scrub and paint the bathroom window woodwork (which includes shutters),(2) make a lip-smacking meatloaf,(3) fight off swarms of stay-at-home dads, (4) wait for the mailman to fill my box, and (5) take a nap to dream of large men.

3. Snacks I enjoy? Hilly, potato chips, cookies, and did I mention Hilly?

4. Things I Would Do If I Were A Billionaire? Pay my brothers and sister a million dollars each to move away and never look for me. Buy each of my kids a house. Give my kids a million dollars each to MOVE OUT. Buy a large house for myself and give Hubs a million dollars to live on the other side of the house and leave me alone.

5. Three of my bad habits? Hmmm….I can’t think of any….I’m perfect! Umm…(1) I dump on  most music from the 70’s. I’m sorry. I said it. I just hate it. (2) I fart in the living room and blame the dog. Oh, the dog farts too, but not as much as he is blamed for. And (3) I procrastinate. That’s why the bathroom window probably won’t get done until September.

6. Five places I have lived? I’ve only ever lived in PA-five different locations, but all in PA. I have however, visited Florida, New Mexico, New Jersey, Delaware, and Washington DC

7. Five jobs I’ve had? (1) Theater concession stand person (2) telemarketer (3) film store manager -similar to Foto-mat (4) Home health aide (5) deli worker and short order cook.

8. How did you name your blog? Every time my kids or friends would tell me some lame-ass excuse for something or other, I would interrupt them with “AH! AH! I don’t wanna hear it!!!” Well, that’s me.

There are so many memes going around that I decided to let you tag yourselves. Some of you need blog fodder, others don’t. So help yourself……there’s plenty of answers to go around!

If you read this post, then you know how I feel about grocery shopping. I don’t like when my routine gets fucked with. I went food shopping tonight and came home with a carload of angry.

Now that our business is slowing because of the economy, I have to be more diligent with my spending. I now use coupons like a religion. I used to use them if I remembered to take them, but now it’s imperative. There are a few items that I use, that no matter how much the coupon is for, I will buy the store brand. My family is full of picky eaters and since I make a shitty spaghetti sauce, I buy the jarred version. Not Prego or Ragu, but the ACME brand. I also use the store brand vegetables, laundry detergent, and garbage bags. Mostly, they are a few cents cheaper and they are no better or worse than the name brands.

Tonight I found no Acme items. Oh, they’re around the store, just not the items I needed to buy. Why?? Even though they fucked with the setup of the store, I stuck with them. I am a loyal customer. I am loyal even to the store brand. This is testing my loyalty.

Well, Mr. Manager, you will be receiving a copy of this post and the last one. You will hear how much I am disappointed with your so-called “improvements”. You will find out how it breaks my heart (and wallet) to move on to greener pastures. Remember-there is a Pathmark LESS THAN 1/4 OF A MILE AWAY!  You practically share a parking lot!Will it cost me more in gas to go there? NO. If anything, it will save me gas because I can stop at Home Depot while I’m over there.

Hmmm…..Now I think about it, why am I still going to ACME?

I am writing this at 7:30 pm on a Sunday night. Normally, I can be found in the chat rooms of Blogtalkradio. As I type these words, many of you are laughing and having a great time listening to Mr Fabulous and Turnbaby. I however am not.

I have this on my elbows:

I don’t know what it is, but it itches something awful. My doctor tells me not to take Benadryl for my allergies but yesterday I went to my neighborhood CVS and asked the pharmacist if she could recommend something that wouldn’t interfere with the Wellbutrin that I take. She said “take Benadryl”. WTF???  Well, I’m itching so bad I said fuck it and so I am. The only problem is that it makes be unconcious. Not drowsy-UN.CON.CIOUS. I slept for most of yesterday, all night last night, and got up this morning about 10am. No creams are helping. Even Caladryl, which is for poison ivy.

I decided to stop taking it so that I could do some laundry, run a vacuum and maybe eat some food. I figured that if I waited until 8pm to take a pill, I’d make it through my shows and finally sleep all night. Well, I made it until 7:15. I popped one of those badboys and it’s kicking in now.

I hate missing the  shows. Especially since tonight’s show was special for Fab and it is also Turnbaby’s birthday. (I think MattMan said she was 60 or something like that.   ) Anyway, there you have it.  A ”What-I-did-this-weekend” and a “MondayMoaning” post all rolled into one.

Now it’s 8pm and I’m goin’ to bed.

This is a Bo-Bo:

Bo-Bo is a terry-cloth plush toy that is sold at most pet stores for cats and dogs. If you’ve ever seen the PETCO commercial, it is the one dragged by the daschund through the store. Bandit just adores them. He had one from the day we brought him home. He slept with it, chewed on it, and learned to shake his head with it in his mouth to beat us with it when he wanted attention. Eventually, he hollowed out the head. I sewed it but just wasn’t the same. So we went out last Sunday and bought  him a new one.

He was in heaven. All other toys took a back seat to Bo-Bo. Again, he took it everywhere and even reverted to sleeping with it like a teddy bear. Then on Wednesday night he did this:

On the left you see the severed ear. On the right you see the ’squeaker’ that made the ever-so -joyful noise that told me that Bandit was busy and not getting into trouble. I took Bo-Bo away and intended to sew the hole up. However, while I was in the shower on Thursday morning, Bandit climbed on a chair and got the toy from the table. He loved the hell out of Bo-Bo. How do I know this? you might ask. I know because signs of the loving were everywhere. I should have taken a picture before I cleaned the mess. This only a small amount of what I found EVERYWHERE!!

Poor Bo-Bo never stood a chance. Bandit ripped him a new hole. It was a sad day.

Now look at this puppy. I ask you….Does this look like the face of a diabolical killer who enjoys slow torture and dismemberment?